“Wicked” Review: No Strange Exhilaration, but No Total Detestation

Let’s get one thing out of the way now: no, I have never seen “Wicked” before. I have never listened to the soundtrack, never seen a performance, never watched a bootleg online or anything. It’s hard to tell whether this makes me the target audience for the new “Wicked” film or not; on the one hand, it’s clearly made to enchant audiences of all ages and tastes, with its frothy set design and undeniably catchy musical numbers. On the other hand, it did feel a bit like an extended inside joke that I just didn’t get, as much as the film kept trying to wink-nudge me into feeling included. In an entertainment economy held hostage by nostalgia, “Wicked” felt like fan service for someone else entirely.

This isn’t to say that I didn’t have fun, because I absolutely did. Some credit is due to the fact that it was the first real movie theater experience I’ve had in months, and to the utter hilarity of the Italian dubbed “Minecraft” trailer before the movie even started. Also, this film felt like a compulsory opt-in for anyone who claims to be interested in pop culture. I don’t need to remind you of all the truly baffling things that have happened on the “Wicked” press tour, but suffice it to say that I needed to find out what production could possibly result in Ariana Grande and Cynthia Erivo’s dynamic (You guys have 10 matching tattoos? What happened to you?). Kidding aside, the obvious joy and pride the cast took in creating this film was genuinely moving and compelled me to investigate further.

“Wicked” begins where we ended “The Wizard of Oz,” with the Munchkins celebrating the death of the Wicked Witch of the West. Glinda the Good Witch (Ariana Grande) joins them, a bit less exuberant than the rest of the crowd, and is prompted to launch into a story of how the two of them used to know each other. She introduces us to Elphaba (Cynthia Erivo), the woman behind the witch. Elphaba is a girl who lives in a world with magic and wizards and talking animals but is shunned because she’s green, so she develops emotion-based magical powers in response to bullying. After arriving at Shiz University to drop off her wheelchair-bound sister Nessarose, Elphaba accidentally demonstrates these remarkable powers and is asked to stay and study with the prolific Madame Morrible (Michelle Yeoh). This infuriates goody-goody Glinda, who is used to having everything handed to her and expected to be a star student right away. The tension between the two girls is exacerbated when they are forced to share a room, but eventually their rivalry gives way to a tender friendship after they perform a painfully long and terribly strange dance together in public. Troublesome rake Fiyero (Jonathan Bailey) stirs up the school with his rebellious antics and wins Glinda’s heart, but is conflicted by his interest in Elphaba which appears to be returned. Eventually, Elphaba is asked to visit the Wizard (Jeff Goldblum) personally to discuss her qualms with the treatment of Oz’s talking animals. She and Glinda go to the Emerald City, a dream come true for both of them, but Elphaba rejects her dream to work alongside the Wizard when she discovers that he is a fraud and behind the oppression of animals. Glinda, for whom this is not a deal-breaker, encourages her friend to stand up for what’s right while she hangs back and makes nice with the baddies. That brings us up to speed.

This was a film that clearly needed to be handled with such care and precision due to its prized status in the theater community, a group of people that should not be offended under any circumstances. One wrong note in “Popular” and they’re liable to come beat down your door and stone you to death. I went into this film knowing almost nothing about the story other than that it was about the witches from “The Wizard of Oz” and that people went absolutely crazy over it. Having seen only half of the show– yeah, this movie is 2 hours and 40 minutes long, and it’s only act one– I am reluctant to judge the narrative in its incomplete state, but I have to say…really? This is what all the hype’s been about? Did you guys know stories are supposed to have likable characters and multiple storylines with comparable levels of intrigue? I can honestly say I didn’t like any of the people in this show and I was frequently wondering if I had blacked out and missed key scenes because there were several load-bearing plot elements that seemed to come out of nowhere.

Glinda and Elphaba are much more compelling as a duo than as individuals, which I suppose is sort of the point. However, it can be trying on one’s patience to witness the umpteenth hair toss from Glinda or the infinitesimal instance of Elphaba being the only person boring enough to leave the library once people start dancing and swinging from the rafters. Their bond, however, is truly magical, and I was deeply moved by the narrative’s focus on how they enable each other to grow. I appreciate the premise of “Wicked,” which is how stories can twist the truth and misrepresent individuals in service of a moral agenda. That said, this story is no less preachy and black-and-white than the original “Wizard of Oz.” Elphaba is frequently the sole voice of reason among hordes of people who are apparently fine with respected goats being dragged to the gulag. Glinda is the nearest thing we get to a morally grey protagonist, but even she makes decisions so bafflingly evil that it’s difficult to empathize with her. It seems as though “Wicked” took the classic Hollywood good-versus-evil narrative and attempted to complicate it by saying, “Actually, everyone you thought was good is evil and vice versa.” But that’s not actually any more interesting, is it?

“Wicked” seems to thrive off of manufacturing “OH!” moments in its audience. I will say that many of these little moments of foreshadowing, both visual and lyrical, are great fun. However, there needed to be approximately 50% less of them. Elphaba does not need to say that she’s going to melt and that all of Oz is going to celebrate because of her both in the span of one song. Fiyero really does not need to sing a song where every other word alludes to the fact that he will one day lose his brain. Again, this is a moment where I wanted the film– or even, retrospectively, the musical– to stand on its own, not rely on the audience’s love for another movie. If there were no “Wizard of Oz,” would we care about this story? Would we want to see how it ends?

It’s getting to the point in this review where I realize how much I’ve been complaining and feel compelled to enumerate the positive qualities of this film, which exist. To be clear, I really didn’t hate “Wicked” at all. I just didn’t like it very much. There’s a big difference. I thought the vocal performances were truly incredible, and the cast chemistry was very, very special. Everyone has been falling over themselves to praise Erivo’s stunning star turn, so let me be among them. She lent the character a necessary measure of vulnerability and tenderness, not to mention her unbelievable voice. In addition, I thought Grande just plain nailed it. She’s been eager to show off her traditional chops for some time, and it’s clear to see that her background in musical theater paid off.

Before I fly off on my broomstick, there’s one thing that bothered me about “Wicked” more than anything else. I did not like how it looked one bit. Loathing, unadulterated loathing, for the lighting, the color grading, the camera work. Not to act four times older than I am, but movies used to be colorful! Especially “The Wizard of Oz!” Let’s briefly compare:

You guys. What are we doing??? I know we don’t have Technicolor anymore, but damn! As can be observed in the above screencap, “Wicked” was plagued by this persistent glaring backlight that washed absolutely everything out. The costumes and sets, which were spectacular, faded to grey after being blasted with the daylight they insisted on using for every scene. If I had to guess, I’d say they think this makes the film look more naturalistic, but guess what? The jig is up! This world isn’t real! No need to do anything but make it look awesome! Because it was both overexposed and undersaturated, the film’s beautiful production design fell flat.

To end this on a high note, “Wicked” is a thoroughly joyful film. It is genuine, exuberant, and playful. It doesn’t take itself too seriously, it fully embraces the whimsy of its tale, and these things are evident in every scene. That’s what makes it, ultimately, fun to watch, and why I can’t say I hate it even though I couldn’t list many things about it I liked. Everyone involved in this movie cared so much, and I value that greatly. As a big fan of the movie musical, though, I am concerned. We made “Chicago,” “La La Land,” and “Hairspray” not that long ago, guys. Let’s go back to basics– colors perceivable with the naked eye, key lighting, and John Travolta in drag.